I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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