hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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