Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
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