But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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