Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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