I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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