I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
