I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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