Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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