Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
