Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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