I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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