Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
