new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
