I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
