come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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