Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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