exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
