i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
