I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
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My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
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I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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