I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
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