do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize