Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
