I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
