just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
This is my gift to your gina
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
