Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
My penis needs a shock collar
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Randomize
