Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(555): View more from

She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.

(555): View more from

Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.

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(613): View more from Ontario

Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome

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(304): View more from West Virginia

Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."

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(315): View more from New York

Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?

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(514): View more from Quebec

When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong

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(513): View more from Ohio

I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?

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