ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
