your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
