adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
