i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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