this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
