yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
