It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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