I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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