i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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