just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize