Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
