Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Randomize
