HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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