I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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