remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs