The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️