I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize