doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
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