SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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