he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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