He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
