xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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