Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
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