she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
