just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
